Dazed and Amazed
by Avalon-blackandgreen
Summary: Buffy, Spike, Dawn, Willow, Xander, Giles, Faith, and WoodpostSunnydale all get thrown around to a bunch of different worlds because the universe has it out for them. My attempt at a humorus fic. Please R&R, it would be apriatiated muches!
1. The Universe Hates You

Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing!

A/N: What could be funnier than all your favorite Buffy characters (that are still alive post Sunnydale) traversing to many different worlds and discovering that as of now anything is possible? If I make any mistakes I beg you to correct me, but some of this is intended to be out of character. And to explain why Kendra is not even mentioned in this story, I hate her! She is EVIL!

Chapter 1: The Universe Hates You

They had no way of knowing it, but the universe was improbably against them. At the moment the anomalies and paradoxes in their future were incomprehensible to them. Of course this unfortunate group was none other than the soon to be ruthlessly tossed together again post Sunnydale Buffy crew.

Now, regarding a certain blonde vampire, Spike, and his loss of solidness and such, it must be understood that the same forces that brought them all together had turned him human. It must also be understood that most of the experiences during his duration with Angel have been erased. (Mostly because the author has never seen any of the episodes of Angel with Spike on them, so no body get all huffy about it!)

Coming around respectively; Buffy, Dawn, Xander, Willow, Giles, Faith, Spike (newly turned human), Wood, and Andrew each made various groaning noises while coming to terms with their strange surroundings. Unfortunately for him, before anyone could notice he was even there, Andrew was sucked into a portal that sent him back where he came from. (This is because it is common sense that Jonathan should have been the nerd that survived.)

Our little group found that they had awoken, and that was all they really got the chance to notice before they were being attacked by a dozen little green creatures. Sadly for the creatures everyone was able to easily toss them to the ground while standing up.

"Bloody hell" Spike yelled as one of the green creatures bit his hand. He quickly dealt it a blow that knocked it out without any thought at all. Then it hit him that he had actually gotten hurt for the first time in a long while. "What the …" he began before he noticed the warmth of the sun on his face and that it wasn't harmful. "Bloody…I mean…there's got to be…am I human?"

"Wait, you're human" Dawn stopped to ask and gawk at Spike. While her attention was otherwise occupied she got a sharp whack on the back of her head. She turned around quickly, effectively dislodging one of the creatures from her shoulder.

"What are these things" called out Buffy.

"I think they look like a species of goblin" Willow replied and backhanded one of the offensive little things.

"Yes, yes" said a particularly puke green goblin. "King give order. Him say bring people to him."

"There's a king" Xander stopped struggling with the goblins tugging on his pant legs long enough to picture a bigger and uglier version of the goblins. He shuddered and suddenly looked up.

They were all beginning to notice the city around them, but even more so they noticed the towering castle in the center of the city. Even more notable was the labyrinth surrounding the city that stretched on to meet the horizon.

"Where are we" Wood asked bewildered.

"Indeed, most people who end up here know very well where they are" an extravagantly dressed man with a British accent and an annoyed tone appeared in front of them. "You are in the goblin city beyond the labyrinth." Then to the goblins that had begun to slowly back away in fear, "It is very clear that you lot can not do anything therefore I am forced to do it myself. If you can't shape up and stop getting beaten by mortals, even when they are mortals paired with a witch and two slayers, I shall be forced to relieve you of your positions! Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes your majesty. You clear King Jareth" babbled the goblin that had spoken to the group before.

"Good" said Jareth his mismatched eyes, one a cold ice blue and the other brown, giving the goblin a death glare. The goblin promptly turned tail and ran after the others. "Now, if you would kindly inform me why you are here" he turned back to the bewildered group.

"You're the goblin king" Xander's one eye widened.

"Yes, yes and they are quite useless creatures. Now I assume you do have a reason for being here" Jareth tapped his foot impatiently.

"Actually we have no idea how we got her or why" Giles began cleaning his glasses on his shirt.

"Well, this hasn't happened during my rule" Jareth crossed his arms and frowned. "Just what I need, first Sarah and now this" he muttered.

"What'd you say" Faith spoke up.

"Nothing" snapped Jareth.

"It's a girl guys" a smirk spread over Faith's face.

"I don't think it's a good idea to get this guy mad Faith, he's Fae, a purely magic being" Willow hissed.

"I suggest you listen to the witch, slayer, I'm much more powerful than I look" Jareth growled.

"Well so is she" Faith retorted.

"I've read a bit on this place, I think we need Jareth not to be mad at us. I think he just may be able to figure this stuff out" Willow said.

"Good luck getting his help! He's been mad as a raging basilisk ever sense the little lady left" snickered a dwarf that had walked over to stand next to the group.

"Hogwart-"

"Hoggle"

"Whatever, I suggest you shut your mouth and leave before you even think about saying another word" Jareth ground out.

"Yes your majesty" Hoggle bowed and shuffled off. As he did so he muttered, "Wouldn't haveta be like dis if he'da just left Sarah's brother out o' it."

"Hogbrain" Jareth called warningly and the dwarf picked up his pace. Then to our group, "Shall we proceed to my conference room?"

"Just one thing, did anybody notice that I'm pretty sure I'm human" Spike said. This caught everyone's attention and they all turned to stare wide eyed at him. "Just sayin" he said a little self-consciously.


	2. Did You Know

Disclaimer: I've said it before and I'll say it again, I own nothing at all! Boohoo:(!

A/N: I apologize for some characters getting the non existent end of the talking stick, but when you have a bunch of characters some of them tend to go mute. I'm working hard on getting Principal Wood to talk, but he's sort of falling into the background. Any who, here's the next chapter of Dazed and Amazed, or D.A. for short if you're lazy like me.

Chapter 2: Did You Know

"So, can you tell us what's happening now" Xander glared at Jareth with his one eye from a cushiony chair across from the haughty monarch.

"Well, as I've said, nothing like this has happened during my rule. Meaning I haven't actually got more than an inkling" Jareth put bluntly. His duel colored eyes roamed around the group setting at the table and they came to rest on Buffy. "Pardon me but, are you dead?"

"Umm, technically twice over" Buffy was surprised by the question. "Well, the first time was really only for a second or two."

"Yes, yes you can tell. Like microscopic sunburn that doesn't go away when you get brought back to life after a certain amount of time" Jareth nodded.

"Yeah, that's the way Tara explained it" Buffy shrugged.

"I hear it's a tough thing, getting brought back. Never had to do it myself, but you must be very strong and such, I respect that" Jareth said grandly. "But now onto more pressing matters-"

Jareth was interrupted by a loud sort of singing/shouting from outside the conference room. "It's not easy being green" several goblins just sort of screamed it.

In irritation Jareth got out of his cushiony velvet chair and walked across the maroon carpet to the door out to his throne room. This door he banged open and yelled out at his subjects, "What is bloody going on out here?"

His answer came from Kermit the frog, who sat in the middle of a large circle of goblins. "Oh, I was just visiting my cousins and singing them a song about being the color green." Strangely, the music kept playing despite the fact that no one had an instrument.

"Well either sod off or never lead my subjects in a song. They sing enough horrible songs as it is" Jareth slammed the door shut again.

Wood leaned across the table to speak to Willow. "Did you know frogs are related to goblins?"

Willow only shook her head.

"Indeed they are when they're Muppets and annoying as the goblins themselves" Jareth said while he resumed sitting in his chair. "But now back to what brought us here, or rather you here."

Just then Sir Didymus riding Ambrosius burst into the room. "If I may say so your majesty, I am almost certain it has to do with my lady Sarah" he said.

"Oh my land! Has my kingdom become even more out of control then I even thought possible" Jareth put his head in he hands.

Then Hoggle showed up from nowhere. "Yes it has your majesty and if you don't mind my sayin so it's all because of y-"

"I'd advise you not to blame this on me" Jareth warned.

"Did you know that I know a lot more then you think I know" Hoggle asked.

"No" said Xander.

Hoggle just looked at Xander like you would look at the mentally insane.

"But it was the right answer, right" Xander looked at Jareth.

"I'm not sure I have any idea what Higgle-"

"-Hoggle-"

"Just said, so I was going to refrain from answering" Jareth said.

"Trust me, it was the right answer" Hoggle patted Jareth on the arm. "Now I spent more time talkin' wid tha little lady than you did. If you had jus left her little brother out o' tha whole mess, she'da likely taken right to ya."

"All useless information now" Jareth waved Hoggle away but the dwarf didn't budge an inch.

"Ya know if ya went to her now, she'd probably be able ta forgive ya if ya worked at it long enough. I've been talkin a lot with her recently, I have and she seems ta miss you too" Hoggle said.

Jareth seemed to brighten up. "You're absolutely right; I'll go to her now and woo her the proper way. Flowers and such rather than kidnapping." He prepared to leave.

The rest of the group just stared in confusion. "How does this have any sodding thing to do with us" Spike asked.

"Oh right, you people. I'll send you to some one who knows more about this stuff than me" Jareth said and made a gesture to send the group away.

Jareth's planned destination for them was his sister's kingdom on the other side of the underground, but seeing as the universe hates our little crew of confused slayers and slayerets, they were instead sucked into an inter dimensional wormhole and sent WAY off track.


	3. I Beg Your Pardon but, You Have Dog Ears

Disclaimer: Must they rub in my face the fact that I own absolutely nothing? Well, I have an Inu-Yasha plushie:)

A/N: Wow, this story just keeps coming out! I may actually finish this fic, if there is a way to finish it. For those of you who have no idea what Inu-Yasha is I hope I've made the personalities of the characters very clear so you can get it anyway.

Chapter 3: I Beg Your Pardon but, You Have Dog Ears

Now, I said that our crew were sucked into an inter dimensional worm hole, but I didn't mention the time warp they hit right after that. So, they don't know it, but they've landed somewhere in the feudal era of Japan. They've landed somewhere in a forest and right in the middle of a fight between the Inu-Yasha crew and a really big, really ugly demon.

When I say the landed in the middle, I literally mean they landed in between the two battling forces. The big purple, slimy cockroach reared up in front of them and out from behind them dashed a man with white hair and dog ears wielding a sword.

"What are you doing? Get out of the way humans" the man yelled. He sunk his sword into the cockroach, but the purple bug acted as if it didn't feel a thing. It flung him off and he landed on his feet.

Buffy had seen a demon very similar to this one once and she nodded at Willow, she knew what to do. Buffy took Mr. Pointy out of her pocket and thanked the powers that be that she always traveled with Mr. Pointy. She charged the big purple bug.

"What are you doing you stupid human" the white haired man screamed at Buffy.

Buffy didn't even take notice of the man; she was already lost in the thrill of battle. When she came to the cockroach she did an extremely powerful front tuck up its leg. She stood on the big slimy head and plunged her stake into each eye. When she pulled Mr. Pointy out of the second eye there was a tiny shard of glass stuck in the goop. Buffy took this with her forefinger and thumb, then leapt off the purple bug.

This was where Willow's magic came into play. She made a few symbols in the air and the purple cockroach burst into a contained flame.

"Do shikon shards burn" asked a girl whose eyes had gone wide.

"Hey, does one of those shard thingies look like a bit of glass" Buffy asked.

"Yes" answered the girl.

Buffy handed the shard to the girl, eye goop and all. "Well then, here you go. I'm Buffy by the way. The redheaded witch is Willow, and they guy with the eye patch is Xander. The bald black guy is Wood, and the girl with her arm around him is Faith. Then this blonde guy next to me is Spike" everyone waved as Buffy introduced them.

The girl with the goopy shard in her hand stopped grimacing at the shard. "I'm Kagome. The girl with the giant boomerang is Sango. The guy who's drooling is Miroku and he's a pervert."

Miroku gave a slight snort of resentment. Then he got down on one knee in front of Willow. "Will you bare my child?"

Willow looked down at him. "I'm gay."

Miroku stood up. He was visibly shaken by the idea that any girl that hot could be gay.

"Any way" Kagome continued. "This little fox is Shippo and that guy sulking over there is Inu-Yasha."

"I beg your pardon but, you have dog ears" Wood said to Inu-Yasha.

"No, really" Inu-Yasha snapped.

"He's half dog demon" Kagome said.

"Oh, he must be like I used to be then" Spike had more to say, but he never got the chance to say it.

"I have never and will never be like you human" Inu-Yasha growled. He started to lung for Spike, but was abruptly stopped by Kagome.

"Sit" Kagome commanded and Inu-Yasha fell face first into the ground.

"See, I've been trying to say that I'm human now" Spike said.

"We heard you the first time" Xander muttered.

"That is so cool. You have to tell me how you do that" Faith marled.

"Well, it's a spell Priests Kaede cast" Kagome said. "By the way, why are you here?"

The group froze. It was a good question, why were they here?

"We don't know" Willow said.

Kagome sighed, "Well then, we'd better take you to see Priests Kaede."

"We don't have to do that. Tell them where to find the old bat and let them figure it out on their own" Inu-Yasha complained.

"No, we're going to escort them. Now come on" Kagome began to lead the way out of the forest and into Kaede's village.


	4. Um, Explain to Me Again How This Works

A/N: Sorry about how long this took. (If anyone was waiting for it.) I hope to write a little more often, but I might not. Oh, and by the way, Kaede's probably way OOC.

Disclaimer: I own nothing so please don't sue me. If you do all you'll get is a little ball of lint.

Chapter 4: Um, Explain to Me Again How This Well Works

"Hey look, we're patch buddies" Xander joked when he was introduced to Kaede.

The old woman chuckled. She turned to Spike and said, "The powers that have given you your gift gave it to you for a reason, so don't screw it up!"

"Ok grandma" Spike said.

"That's Priestess to you" Kaede snapped.

"So, can you help us" Buffy asked.

"Perhaps" Kaede said. "Kagome, do you think they are from your time?"

"I don't really know" Kagome said.

"They may be able to use the bone eater's well" Kaede nodded.

"If it might get us home, I'll try it" Faith volunteered.

"Then we'll take you to the well" Kagome said.

Faith stood at the edge of the bone eater's well. "So I just jump in" she asked.

"Need a push" Inu-Yasha offered.

"No dog boy, my legs work just fine" Faith snapped.

"Inu-Yasha" Kagome reprimanded.

"Well, here I go." Faith jumped into the well, and landed hard on her butt. "Ow!"

"So, she didn't make it then" Spike said as everyone peered over the edge of the well.

"I could do with a little help up guys" Faith called up. Then she disappeared.

"What" was the collective response.

"I guess we had better follow her" Wood said and jumped in.

One by one the others followed, leaving Inu-Yasha, Kagome, Sango, Miroku and Shippo to wonder where they went.

They themselves were wondering where they went. For one moment they appeared to be on the bridge of a ship looking at a man with two heads. Then that image disappeared.

"That's funny, I thought I saw some one" Zaphod's right head said.

"You're just imagining things" his left head said.

A/N: I know it's really short, but hopefully the next one will be up soon, if not today even. R&R, pretty please.


	5. High School is Maddening

A/N: Ok, so I lied a little bit about how long it would take to get this chapter out, but I just didn't know what to write, and then I got the brilliant idea for The 101 Uses of Duct Tape, so things just weren't going well for this until now. I've also just realized that I have completely ignored the fact that Dawn and Giles were in the story at all, so they reappear here as though they were never gone, sorry about that.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything. Not Buffy and not Azumanga Dio.

Ch.5: High School is Maddening

Each of the members of our little gang landed ass first on the roof a building. It took them a moment of cringing for the pain to dull. Faith bounced up first.

"Where the hell are we now" she groaned.

"I think we may still be in Japan" Buffy said.

"How do you know" Willow looked over the edge of the building. Clumps of students in uniforms were making their way into the building.

"Just a hunch I guess" Buffy joined Willow in looking down at the students. One of the students, it looked like a girl, appeared to be pointing up at them and jumping up and down.

"I think we've been spotted" Wood said.

The girl who had been pointing at them raced into the building. The small group she had left behind took a moment to stare up at the strange people on the roof of the school before slowly following the first girl.

In only a few moments the first girl was on the roof with them. "Hi, I'm Tomo" she said excitedly. "Whatca doin' up here?"

"We don't know" Dawn said.

"Well that's a bummer" Tomo said. "Hey, you're really old" she said to Giles.

"Well" Giles said huffily and cleaned his glasses.

The others in Tomo's group came to the roof looking very disinterested in the strangers on the roof. "Tomo, we'll be late for class" one of them said.

"Don't worry so much Yomi" Tomo slapped her on the back.

"We shouldn't talk to strangers" the shortest of the girls, and most likely the youngest said.

"What are they going to do Chio, push us off the roof? So, where are you guys from any way?" Tomo asked.

"America" Dawn said.

"Get out" Tomo screeched and shoved Dawn. Unfortunately, Dawn was too close to the edge and she fell off the building.

"DAWN" screamed Buffy. As she watched her sister fall Buffy felt helpless, until Dawn suddenly disappeared.

"Cool, how'd she do that" Tomo said.

"Come on, jump" Buffy commanded the others. They all disappeared before they hit the ground.

"We should jump too" Tomo said excitedly.

"No" Yomi said and grabbed Tomo.

Sakaki noticed Yomi struggling to keep Tomo from plummeting to her death and pined Tomo down by sitting on her.

"Oh, now where are we" Dawn wined.

A/N: He, he, sorry about the whole Dawn and Giles thing again. This was the shortest amount of time they've spent in a world so far. All the other worlds have had two chapters. Where will they end up next? Will I finally get around to writing a Spuffy scene like I want to? You'll just have to keep reading and reviewing to find out.


	6. Phantoms and Tunnels

A/N: Yes, I am once again gracing you with another installment of Dazed and Amazed. I can see a somewhat more organized inner plot coming up in the future, some readers will be happy, but I assure you that it will remain pretty random and funny.

Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothin'. This means that it must belong to someone else; therefore I am only borrowing these characters because it's fun.

Ch. 6: Phantoms and Tunnels

They were in a dank sort of hallway just in front of a bend in the corridor. "Eww, it's all moldy" Dawn complained.

"Shh" Giles hushed the teen.

From around the corner a male's voice sang strongly. "Sing once again with me, our strange duet, my power over you, grows stronger yet."

"Wait, I know this one. It's Sweet again, and it's not my fault this time" Xander said peeking around the corner.

"It's not Sweet, it's Phantom of the Opera" Willow hissed.

"You expect me to know" Xander said.

"Shut up the both of you" Giles said. "If we follow that man and woman we're sure to find a way out eventually."

"By falling through another portal" Wood said sarcastically.

"If we have to, yes" Giles replied.

"He has to be a vampire. I don't understand how you can hold a note out that long" Xander whispered as the last note of the Music of the Night rang through the creepy cave place.

"He's not a vampire, he's a deform" Faith said.

"Would you all shut up? You're going to get us killed" Dawn hissed. "Don't you remember? We watched this movie last week. Keep your hands at the level of your eyes."

"We did just watch this last week, didn't we" Buffy whispered in remembrance.

"Ahh!" It was Willow's scream. "A rat just ran over my foot" she whispered hoarsely.

The Phantom turned around sharply and grabbed his lasso. He came upon the group quickly and menacingly. "Who are you" he barked.

"Um, we just" Willow stuttered.

"Fell through a trans-dimensional port" Dawn said quickly. Her older sister looked at her sharply and she cringed.

"So you are the travelers" the Phantom said and let his lasso hang loose at his side.

"What do you mean, we are the travelers" Giles began to clean his glasses.

"There is a legend in this world about dimension travelers. I can say no more about it. There is a portal here. I will take you to it." The Phantom turned around and began to walk away.

"Sounds like a lot of rubbish if you ask me" Spike said.

The Phantom spun back around and was at Spike's throat before anyone registered anything. "I do not have to be so generous. I could just as easily end your journey here as help you to the next world."

"Ok" Spike croaked. The Phantom let go of him and he massaged his throat.

"Come, if you stay much longer you'll wake Christine." The Phantom led them to a red velvet banner on the wall. He pulled it back and there was a tunnel behind it. They entered the tunnel.

Before Dawn entered the tunnel she mumbled, "I hate Raoul." The Phantom gave her an odd look, but she passed him quickly.

"It's pretty dark in here" Wood said.

"Wonder where it leads to" Faith said.

"I bet this is where he goes at the end of the movie" Dawn said.

"Dawn" Buffy put a hand on her sister's shoulder to keep track of her. "Let's just worry about what comes next."

So they ventured deeper into the tunnel and the dark that seemed almost palpable. Their sense of time became distorted and none of them could say weather they had been traveling for seconds or days.

A/N: So, how'd I do? They're spending less time in each world than they were before, but a semi-plot is trying to rear its head up and roar.


	7. Cameos and You're the Ones

A/N: Ah, this feels great. What with the typing and the story, could I be any happier? Well, yes, I could be happier, but that would be scary for all those who know me well. I present to you the second part of the inkling of an actual plot today.

Disclaimer: I own nothing that I obviously don't own. I own only myself, and I have to share that with my alternate personality Phoebe and the voice in my head, Phobos.

Ch. 7: Cameo and You're the Ones We're Waiting For

The brightness of light came upon them much too suddenly. They had to take a moment to adjust. When they could finally see again, they saw a teenage girl sitting at a computer. She was a pretty girl with red hair.

"Are we back in our world" Dawn stammered.

The girl whipped around in her swivel chair. "What the… you're not supposed to be here yet!"

"Where exactly is here, and who are you" Buffy asked.

"I'm Avalon, and here is not where you're supposed to be right now" Avalon said.

"Then why are we here" Giles asked.

"I'm sure that I don't know" Avalon imitated her English teacher, but none of them knew that. "Let's see… we can fix this real easy." Avalon turned back to the computer and typed something rapidly.

"Wait!" Faith called out, but it was too late. Darkness once again consumed the group. They reappeared in a giant tree at the center of a park.

"Hey Alex, I think that's them" a teenager with auburn hair wearing a sun charm said.

"Where" asked the girl, Alex, who looked like the other girl but her hair was streaked with silver and she wore a moon pendant.

"Up there, in the tree. They just appeared" the first girl said pointing.

"Really Cam? Those are the people we've been waiting for" Alex scoffed.

"Hey" Buffy said as she nimbly leapt from one of the higher branches of the tree.

"Whoa. Ileana said something about a slayer, but she didn't say anything about a gymnast" Alex said a little more then slightly awed.

Faith, Wood, Willow, Xander and Spike got out of the tree fairly quickly. Buffy helped Giles down and Spike helped Dawn, much to her protest. "I'm not a little girl Spike."

"I know nibblet" Spike sighed. "Doesn't mean you can't still hurt yourself."

"Nibblet" Cam turned her head to the side in curiosity. "How do you come about the nickname nibblet?"

"There's kind of a complicated story behind that" Spike said.

"Oh, so you must be the vampire turned human. The one who-"

Alex clamped a hand over Cam's mouth. "We're not supposed to tell them that part."

"What part" Faith raised any eyebrow.

"It's nothing, yet" Alex said enigmatically. "We've been waiting to show you the next portal."

"We're also supposed to tell you the first part of the legend" Cam said.

"You're the second person to have mentioned a legend" Giles commented.

For lack of having said much of anything in this fic, Wood grunted. Then when he saw he was in the clear, he spoke. "So what exactly is this legend?"

"Well, it's a legend about your travels and what you learn from them, I think" Cam said a little uncertain. "It's really puzzling."

"When the universe hates the travelers/ It teaches them a lesson well deserved/ And nothing can keep them in one place too long/ Once vampire now human/ Twice dead now in love/ Nothing can stop them" Alex resisted part of the legend.

"Sounds like that bit's about me and you love" Spike told Buffy. "I guess you did say you loved me."

"You're the one who didn't believe me" Buffy poked him.

"Well next time I'll take your word for it" Spike smirked.

"If there is a next time" Buffy flipped her hair.

"You heard the legend" Spike said.

"Can we go now" Dawn, Faith, and for the first time in this chapter Xander spoke simultaneously. Giles was cleaning his glasses and Wood just averted his gazed and tried to plug his ears without looking like he was trying.

"Um, ok" Cam said. "The portal's open, just hop in."

The portal was a circle on the ground contained by a ring of mugwart. "Mugwart, the traveling herb" Willow smiled. "Nice choice."

"So you're a witch too" Alex asked.

"Yup" Willow smiled and was the last to jump into the portal.

A/N: See, I told you! There is almost definitely a plot starting to form, but it's still funny. If you didn't know, Cam and Alex are from the book series TWitches. DEATH TO THE CRAPY DISNEY MOVIE VERSION! THE BOOKS RULE!

So, there you have it. You may now review to your heart's content.


	8. Oh No Fuzzy Animals

A/N: Gods! It's been forever. I've neglected my poor little fanfiction. It's ok, I'm back. For a little while.

Disclaimer: Who could have guessed it? I don't own Pokemon or Buffy. According to my dad, I don't even own me, he does.

Ch.8: Oh No Fuzzy Animals

They all appeared standing upright by a stream in a forest clearing. Then Dawn was attack by a yellow blur and toppled onto her back.

"Pikachu!" The fuzzy yellow creature was sitting on Dawn's stomach and twitched an ear.

"Ahhh! Get it off" Dawn screamed.

"What the heck is it" Faith nudged the pikachu with her foot and it hopped off Dawn.

"It's a pokemon" Xander said.

"You know this how" Buffy asked.

"Just keep it away from me" Dawn cowered behind her sister.

"Don't look at me like that. What else was I supposed to do at the hospital while they kept me overnight to observe my eye" Xander shifted uneasily.

"There you are Pikachu" a boy called out. "Come here." Pikachu ran over to the dark haired boy and hopped up his arm to his shoulder.

"How can you touch it" Dawn squealed.

"Hi, I'm Ash" he seemed to ignore Dawn's comment and held a hand out to Willow.

"Don't touch him Willow! You'll be infected with pokemonitis" Dawn stopped Willow from shaking Ash's hand.

"So there's this part of the legend I'm supposed to tell you" Ash said. "It goes…you know what? I forgot how it goes. Hey Misty, help me please!"

Misty walked into the little clearing by the stream. "I should have known better than to trust you Ash. It goes like this. The witch with her burden/ emotion she has strived to deal with/ she's found only wrong places/ but soon her efforts will avail."

"Sounds like it's taking about you Will" Xander said.

"I know my burden, but what's that about wrong places" Willow asked.

"I think it means Kennedy" Dawn said bluntly.

"What" Willow asked confused.

"I know I sound really mean, but we could all tell that Kennedy was way wrong for you. She was too bossy" Dawn said.

"And bitchy" Buffy said behind her hand.(The author clearly despises Kennedy.)

"Oh, I guess you're right" Willow looked down at her feet.

"But hey," Xander said, "on the bright side, you're going to find a good thing to help you."

"Yeah" Willow smiled.

"Ok, Zappdos make a portal" Ash yelled.

Misty looked at Ash like he was a six fingered freak. "Ash, are you insane?"

"No, I'm the ultimate master and friend to all pokemon" Ash laughed maniacally.

"I still don't see any Zappdos" Misty crossed her arms and tapped her foot.

"Wait for it" Ash said.

"Can we leave now? This place is scary" Dawn whimpered as pikachu sneezed cutely. "Are we waiting for a pokemon? Is this Zappdos thing that's going to make the portal a pokemon?"

Just then Zappdos showed up and tried to bow to Dawn, but Dawn ran around in a circle screaming. So Zappdos just made the portal and left sadly.

"Wow, she's like the pokemon whisperer" Wood said.

"What" Faith inched away from him.

"I just needed to say something. I hardly ever get to. I don't know why I'm even here" Wood complained.

"Well, off we go then" Spike said.

"I'm not going thought that poke-infested portal" Dawn shuddered.

"Dawn, it is in your best interest to leave, or would you rather stay here with the, pokemon" Giles said.

"I'm gone" Dawn said and jumped though the portal.

"Thanks Giles" Buffy said and followed.

"Saddle up Wood, we're on the road again" Faith pulled Wood though the portal.

The remainder of the group did not have funny good bye lines, or any sort of lines at all, so they just went though the portal.

A/N: No, I will not apologize for the Kennedy bashing. I hated the character for several reasons and think she is as annoying as the character Hellfrix was in her short reign. Did anybody notice that the same woman who played Hellfrix is now playing a new character on Grey's Anatomy? A character that is just as annoying as Hellfrix. Anyway, pip pip cheerio and don't forget to review.


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